think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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