Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
