i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Randomize
