Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
