david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
