wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Randomize