Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
