R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
