Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Randomize
