somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
