i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
