He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
