I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
