if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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