I smell stomach acid.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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