i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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