Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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