I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
