He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
