no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize
