she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
