You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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