Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Randomize