it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
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