I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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