you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
