Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize
