awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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