were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
i dont even know how to be here
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Randomize
