There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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