Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
