Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
