Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
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