There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
