before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize