try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
