are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
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