i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
