My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
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