Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
he puts the penis in happiness.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
