I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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