As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
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