The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize