Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
