so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
