those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
