Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
