I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize