i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
