"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
cat food counts as protein by the way
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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