i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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