I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
