Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
