You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
